Kindergarten Homework

So the instructions on this assignment:  "say the name of each picture. If it begins with the sound of c, print c on the line. Then trace the whole word."

 Now are you going to tell me that no one noticed this???? REALLY??? And of course we were working on Bean's fine motor skills, and we were doing a lot of erasing and rewriting of his lower case c's. I guess he added one too many, and I didn't notice he made a mistake until it was returned.

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Stay The F**K Asleep

Stay the F**k Asleep 

At midnight as I'm almost asleep you come running in my room,

Begging to curl right back up like you're still in my womb.

I read you a story, tucked you in, gave you water, and kisses goodnight,

That was 4 hours ago why aren't you still under the covers tight???

Lay down little one I don't want to hear a peep

PLEASE OH PLEASE JUST STAY THE F**K ASLEEP!

Your brother and you must have telepathy or hatred for me,

He is right behind you and my God you're five and three.

I've taken you to doctors, sleep studies, EEGs galore,

I've even had your adenoids removed so you wouldn't snore.

What more will it take?

So you won't awake?

I can't take it anymore no more Mommy speak,  "BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP"

PLEASE OH PLEASE JUST STAY THE F**K ASLEEP!

You're both in my bed and my ass is hanging off the side,

Oh how many nights I have given up and cried.

You lay on my head, kick me in my ribs, and flail all night

When will this end is their peaceful sleep in sight?

The bags under my eyes are getting bigger as I weep

PLEASE OH PLEASEEEEEEE JUST STAY THE F**K ASLEEP!

The experts definitely have never been a mother in the middle of the night,

Being awaken with a child right in your face, what a fright!

Stop trying to give me a heart attack I don't want to reenact The Sixth Sense,

The years of sleep deprivation are making this mama tense.

What did I do so wrong in my past life before,

That every single night is another sleep war?

Chocolate, candy, money, I'll bribe you with the best,

What will it take so you will let me rest?

Little ones this situation is getting deep,

WHY OH WHY OH WHY WONT YOU STAY THE F**K ASLEEP?

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You Are a Person, Not a Perfect

 “A person's a person, no matter how small.”

― Dr. Seuss, Horton Hears a Who!

I love Horton Hears a Who! The story resonates with me deeply. I place great  importance on the concept that  all living creatures have a purpose and that life is meaningful.  Being a kind and empathetic person is something I find necessary for all people to possess to be truly happy in life.  I have this thought process and it works something like this: physical appearance and intelligence, you are born with,  but compassion, love, and kindness, you are taught. When you are old, it doesn't matter how attractive you were, how smart you were, how successful you were, if you aren't a genuinely nice person, you will find yourself without real friends. It is my goal to raise nice, giving, contributing members of society. 

On a day to day basis, this can be hard to remember. Especially when you are me and your focus is often sucked into what can I accomplish, get done, achieve today? What will make me good enough? What will get me closer to being perfect?

I don't want my sons to have the perfect demon inside of them that I fight daily;  the idea that they need to do it perfect, act perfect, and feel perfect. We are all unique. We have our strengths and our weaknesses and as a Mom I feel the need to remove expectation from what my children will accomplish and achieve. I want most for them to be truly happy and to bring joy to others in whatever they do. I want them to be authentic and connect with the human experience we are all having. To be able to accomplish that, they must have the ability to love, to be caring, and most of all, to be empathetic.

That sounds so fluffy and pretty.

In practice this is a challenge! In order to teach this to them, I must model these behaviors.  When you pick your kid up from school and he has his behavior checked off for squirming too much and not paying attention for the third time this week, and your other child has pooped all over your floor twice in one day because he needs to be potty trained to go to his school and is refusing, and they are fighting with each other and acting so selfish, it is easy to lose it.

However, I have decided to try something new. When Bean came home with a level 1, I didn't tell him he needed to do better.

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